Disappointed.....but SO Thankful.

Disappointed

Tuesday's important appointment didn't happen. If there is one thing certain in adoption.....nothing is certain. It's one of those times that we'd rather not discuss the details of how or why. It just didn't happen. :(  Of course we are tremendously disappointed. We are hoping that there maybe a rescheduled appointment next week. We thank you in advance for your heartfelt, committed prayers on our behalf. We do feel them. 

I have a saying, "Adoption is not for wimps!" It is very, very true. When we teach adoption classes we tell folks that they have to approach adoption with "eyes wide open" - knowing that it isn't an easy road to travel, but it is truly a miracle like no other.

Thankful

We are thankful for our God who is still on his throne. We are thankful for so many, many people like YOU that are devoted to praying for our family, Nash, and the adoption to be finalized.

With every other thought, the enemy whispers in my ear: "This adoption is never going to happen,"  "He's never coming home," "This isn't fair" "Why isn't God answering you?"  This is serious spiritual warfare, folks.  John 10:10 says:  The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. This thief is working hard to rob me of the truth that I know and to destroy the plans that God has already spoken to me about this adoption so long ago.

Your prayers are so needed. It has been hard to have a thankful heart in the midst of adversity over this long period of struggle, but day by day, we will continue to fight back and be thankful!

No Plan B

No matter how much I struggle to see the good around me in the midst of this storm, God will never give up on me. Therefore, we will never give up this fight to bring our son home! We're following God's model of pursing us with relentless, wreckless, unending love at whatever the cost or pain. There was no plan B for me.  John 14:18 says:  I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.  So there's no Plan B for Nash. It's that simple.  He's coming home. We will continue to rely on God for understanding of what direction to go and His timing and plan, but we know that there is no plan B. :)

It wouldn't be my blog if there wasn't a song or two! They are both just perfect. Song #1 is a current favorite that speaks straight to my soul. Song #2 has been a part of mine and Jeff's lives for over 25 years......it's "our song."  It wasn't a typical love song and we had no idea how MUCH it would make sense for the various storms we have weathered in our lives together. I have no idea if Mr. Corey Hart is a believer or not....but song #1 paired with song #2 =  only a "God thing" if you ask me!  ;+)

Song #1: 
http://youtu.be/lOmkDx2bzic

Song #2
http://youtu.be/Fj60WPUFs1U

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!,

Brooke

A Lesson Twice Learned......Hope restored

 Less than 8 hours after penning the post entitled Heartbroken & Blessed, I woke up and read this devotional verse:

 

Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.  Psalm 27:14

***Warning: This post is a little long, but I PROMISE it's worth the news at the end! :)

 

I'll be perfectly honest. My first, raw reaction (especially at 6am) was one of pure frustration and anger!! WAIT??!!!!! Did that just say the word WAIT.....not once, but repeated twice in the same verse, just to make sure I didn't miss it? Are you KIDDING me??? Wait??!! Oh, sure!! I'm an expert at waiting at this point. A real professional. I literally do it like it's my job. :(   And what's that gotten me exactly?? A fat lot of nothing! We have now crossed the 2 year mark on waiting for Nash. We have waited on a foreign government, spelling mistakes, holiday shutdowns, our own government, you name it...I bet we've waited on it!

 

Wow. I know. Pretty ugly. Just keepin' it real, ya'll. That's the actual dialogue that was going on in my head...and let's be honest...between me & God. All before my feet even hit the floor this morning. OUCH! But, before you judge me too harshly.....I read the verse again, prayed and decided that GOD IS GOOD NO MATTER WHAT! Whew. Yikes.

 

Don't get me wrong, I still did not like hearing the word wait....again.....not one little, teensy-tiny bit. It reduced me to a 2 year old in a matter of seconds. But, as I finished my prayers I said, "Ok Lord, I don't understand this. And I don't LIKE this. But I will wait, because you have made it abundantly clear today that I am supposed to."  And just like that I felt a sense of peace....at least enough to get me out of the bed (which is a struggle many days.)

 

15 years ago I started my first big course in waiting when we were struggling with infertility. God taught me so much about who He is, His perfect timing and plan and his faithfulness as he taught me each lesson in the "wait" to become a mom. Looking back now, I wouldn't give back one of the million tears that was shed during that painful season of life. It lead me to the beautiful, perfect plan that he had worked out for me long before mine or any of my children's births. But, in the busyness of just "living" this life, apparently I have forgotten all of those lessons learned. Time for round two I suppose. :)

 

So I'm really glad that I took the time tonight to read ALL of Psalm 27! This is definitely a case where you need to read from the bottom up and get the back story to understand what is going on! I had instant tears streaming down my face as I realized what God was saying to me. Yesterday I had posted that I was Brokenhearted & Blessed because I could feel God closer to me than ever before. That I could feel everyone's prayers working and God's mighty hand fighting the battle on our behalf, even in our greatest feelings of despair and hopelessness.

 

Here's all of Psalm 27: 

Psalm 27

Of David.

¹ The Lord is my light and my salvation—
    whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life—
    of whom shall I be afraid?

² When the wicked advance against me
    to devour^[a] me,
it is my enemies and my foes
    who will stumble and fall.
³ Though an army besiege me,
    my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
    even then I will be confident.

⁴ One thing I ask from the Lord,
    this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
    all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the Lord
    and to seek him in his temple.
⁵ For in the day of trouble
    he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent
    and set me high upon a rock.

⁶ Then my head will be exalted
    above the enemies who surround me;
at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy;
    I will sing and make music to the Lord.

⁷ Hear my voice when I call, Lord;
    be merciful to me and answer me.
⁸ My heart says of you, “Seek his face!”
    Your face, Lord, I will seek.
⁹ Do not hide your face from me,
    do not turn your servant away in anger;
    you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
    God my Savior.
¹⁰ Though my father and mother forsake me,
    the Lord will receive me.
¹¹ Teach me your way, Lord;
    lead me in a straight path
    because of my oppressors.
¹² Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
    for false witnesses rise up against me,
    spouting malicious accusations.

¹³ I remain confident of this:

    I will see the goodness of the Lord

    in the land of the living.

¹⁴ Wait for the Lord;

    be strong and take heart

    and wait for the Lord.

 

 

And of course there is an amazing song that has been on auto-repeat in my mind on my darkest days. I hope it blesses you the way it has me:  http://youtu.be/qOkImV2cJDg

 

Hope restored

 

Soooo........at 10:47am this morning, Jeff sent me a text that read: "Check your email!!" It was from the government officials in Ghana confirming that there will be (hopefully) a final review of our paperwork at the U.S. Embassy NEXT Tuesday!!!!!!!  So please pray for Boat (our power of attorney) and a positive outcome! Wow! My head is still spinning.  I haven't stopped smiling. I was able to tell my children that their years-long prayers are finally being answered. That their brother IS coming home, not one day, but SOON!

 

We are praying for a Christmas miracle....that Nash might be home in time for Christmas! (It's probably a long shot, but we know God can do anything!!)

 

 

Thanks so much for your continued daily prayers! We need them now more than ever!

 

~Brooke

Heartbroken & Blessed

Psalm 34

The Message (MSG)

¹⁸ If your heart is broken, you’ll find God right there; if you’re kicked in the gut, he’ll help you catch your breath.

 

TENTH AVENUE NORTH

 

"Worn"
I’m Tired I’m worn
My heart is heavy
From the work it takes
To keep on breathing
I’ve made mistakes
I’ve let my hope fail
My soul feels crushed
By the weight of this world

And I know that you can give me rest
So I cry out with all that I have left

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart
That’s frail and torn
I wanna know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that’s dead inside can be reborn
Cause I’m worn

I know I need to lift my eyes up
But I'm too weak
Life just won’t let up
And I know that you can give me rest
So I cry out with all that I have left

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart
That’s frail and torn
I wanna know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that’s dead inside can be reborn
Cause I’m worn

My prayers are wearing thin
Yeah, I’m worn
Even before the day begins
Yeah, I’m worn
I’ve lost my will to fight
I’m worn
So, heaven come and flood my eyes

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart
That’s frail and torn
I wanna know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that’s dead inside can be reborn
Cause all that’s dead inside will be reborn

Though I’m worn
Yeah I’m worn

 

If you don't know the song above by Tenth Avenue North, please take a moment and listen:  http://youtu.be/g7DS1aUV8e8

 

So.....yeah. That pretty much sums it up. It's all over the place.....like me. Worn out. Prayers wearing thin. Pleading with God to show me that the struggle will end. Yet knowing that HE is the one that can give me rest and mend my broken heart.......IF I LET HIM.

 

Blessed......

 

It's a weird mix of feeling: being so "crushed in spirit" and brokenhearted and yet KNOWING that God is with me. Closer than ever. Working all the while on my behalf and more importantly on Nash's behalf. 

 

And SO many of you have helped me feel God's love and power surrounding our family during this struggle. We continue to get more and more people committed to being prayer warriors for our adoption. THANK YOU!

 

We have also had numerous people bless us with financial gifts for puzzle pieces in the past few weeks. Every little blessing adds up......Nash's plane ticket home (around $800) is more than halfway paid for!

 

As always, we cherish your partnership in prayer and are thankful for any blessings we receive.

 

Please click the link if you would like to know more about our Puzzle Piece Prayer Pledge: 

 

http://breezefamilyadoption.blogspot.com/2013/11/puzzle-piece-prayer-pledge-to-bring.html

 

 

Even More Blessings:

 

Of course, these 5 blessings keep me plenty busy while we are anxiously waiting to bring their brother home!  A huge chunk of my heart was left in Ghana with Nash. It will not be fully mended until I hold my boy safely in my arms again. But our all-knowing God has these wonder blessings putting little "band-aids of love" on Mama's heart daily!

 

 They are very excited for Nash to come home and be one of the "Breeze Kids!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 ~Brooke

Puzzle Piece Prayer Pledge to Bring Nash Home!

Partner With Us in Prayer

Long before God brought a child named Isaiah to me in a dream, he brought me scripture after scripture from the book of Isaiah. Please join me in believing this one:

Isaiah 65

²⁴ I will answer them before they even call to me. While they are still talking about their needs,
  I will go ahead and answer their prayers!

At the beginning of our adoption journey, we had a puzzle created (513 pieces) using Nash's picture (below).

We now have a little over 100 pieces left to complete the puzzle and we'd like to have those pieces sponsored by committed prayer warriors! We've been home over 4 months and our paperwork has hit a real standstill. Each day that passes is agonizing being apart from the son that now bears our name.

If you are willing to pray DAILY for our adoption until Nash comes home, please email your name/your family's name to brookeb@fuse.net   We will write your name on the back of one of the puzzle pieces to help complete Nash's puzzle. We also ask that you print one of the pictures from our blog and hang it on your fridge or in your office, etc. to remind you to pray for Nash and all the other children out there waiting for families. Lastly.....spread the word!! We can use all the prayer partners we can get! Please share our story on Facebook, Twitter, email, with anyone that will PRAY without ceasing for our boy to come home!

Previously we did ask folks to prayerful consider sponsoring puzzle pieces (suggested donation is $10 per puzzle piece).  If you wish to bless us with a financial gift in addition to your prayers, we would be very grateful. (We still have 2 plane tickets to Africa to purchase!)

We've made it simple to donate online. Just click on the PayPal button on the top right of this page.  If you would like to mail a check, please email us at brookeb@fuse.net and we'll send you our address.

The completed puzzle will be placed in a "floating" frame so the back of the puzzle can be seen.  This will be a treasure to our son and a lasting reminder of the many wonderful people that helped bring him home!  As we work together as a family to put each sponsored puzzle piece in its place, it will also serve as a reminder of God's faithfulness.  Hopefully by the time the puzzle is complete our precious new son will be home with us!



                                                  

 Nasiru Isaiah Breeze 

To sponsor puzzle pieces, please click on the PayPal button on the top right of this page.  Be sure to leave us a comment or send us an email with the name(s) that you would like printed on the back of each sponsored puzzle piece!